I Love You More
by parismylove
Summary: ON HIATUS. They were just friends. That was what they started out as. That was what had always worked. That was what they were meant to be, right? Only they know the truth. E/B Rated M for language/lemons
1. Chapter 1 Prologue  Sept 2004

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **This is exciting! I'm so happy to be writing another story. This one is going to be slightly different than FYA for those of you that read it. Chapters will range from very, very short (200 words) to long (? words). The length will really depend on what needs to happen, but know that every chapter is important.

So, let's get this show on the road because I'm itching to introduce my new characters! I mean... Stephenie's characters...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

* * *

**CHAPTER 1**

_Prologue_**  
**

"Isabella Swan, would you do me the extraordinary honor of marrying me?"

I wasn't really sure what my heart was wanting to do as I stared at her, perched in her seat next to me, wide-eyed and surprised. One second it felt like it was going to stop. The next it was beating at such a rapid pace, I was afraid it was going to explode out of my chest.

Evident by the 46,000 pairs of eyes trained on her and her alone and the unprecedented silence around, I wasn't the only one holding my breath waiting for an answer. Safeco Field and its fans were used to these events, one where a boy asked a girl to marry him through the incredibly romantic video board lit up with dancing hearts and giant letters. Girl would nod as she held off tears, and then "She said YES!" would flash across the screen as the couple collapsed into a hug, sending the crowd into an uproar of cheers and congratulations.

Yes, this should be standard fare. But it wasn't. For this proposal... this was special.

You see, Isabella Swan was no ordinary girl. Isabella Swan, known simply as Bella to all of her friends that were sitting next to her on the front row behind the dugout, was the only daughter of the Seattle Mariners manager Charlie Swan, who was currently standing on home plate with the rest of his team beaming with pride.

But the friends, the father, the fans, the players? None of them mattered anymore. They ceased to exist. Because even though Bella's beautiful eyes were once trained down at the giant square diamond set in platinum nestled into the Tiffany diamond ring box, she had since looked up... and she was staring at _me. _

* * *

_September 2004_

"Shit! Fucking son of a bitchin' bastards!"

Never in my life had I seen a hotter girl.

"God dammit!"

And such a foul-mouthed one at that.

So this was what I'd been dreading all summer? An ass as perfect as the one she was sporting, stuck up in the air as she crawled around on the pavement, chasing after the escaped dorm supplies that had unceremoniously dropped right out of the bottom of the bulging box she was carrying?

That box wasn't the only thing that was bulging as I stopped walking from my car to the entrance of the dorm to ogle her goods, barely concealed in the tiniest pair of navy blue cotton shorts known to man.

What was I so worried and stressed about five minutes ago? I sure couldn't remember. College was going to be great.

"Need a hand?" I asked after I eagerly jogged up to her, ready to lather my Man Suave on her.

"Only if you've got like fifty," she sighed, stretching for a baseball-patterned number two pencil that was picking up speed as it began its roll down the slope of the parking lot. "These stupid fucking boxes aren't worth a damn. Third fucking one that's busted since this morning. If I wasn't supposed to act a certain way, I'd sure rip the equipment manager a new asshole tomorrow for giving these to me!"

I laughed tensely, unsure if I was about to upset her even more. She sure seemed to hold a lot of rage for such a small thing. "You've got quite the vocabulary."

She shrugged nonchalantly, still not looking over to me as I cautiously picked up a box of tampons with two fingers and tossed it in a bright green plastic basket thing she'd pulled out of her Mercedes. "You can blame my father. He's a professional cusser. It's a learned behavior."

"He's a _what?_" I asked. Who the hell's job was it to cuss for a living? And where could I sign up for that degree?

Wrapping her arms around her chest, clutching as many fallen items to her body as she possibly could, she finally turned toward me to drop the stuff in the basket, and my breath caught in my throat. From where I was standing before, I could already tell she was hot, but standing this close I could actually see her eyes – her hypnotizing brown eyes, wider than the moon and deeper than the deepest ocean. I was lost in them, locked in a place where I was unable to function as I normally did around girls. My Man Suave was completely gone, rinsed away on this tidal wave of brown hair and eyes.

"I'm Bella," she stated, poking a free finger out to me as a form of a handshake offering as she still held onto the stuff. "Bella Swan. Daughter of Charlie Swan, new manager of the Seattle Mariners... last year's worst team in major league baseball."

Eyebrows raised, feeling oh so much more inferior, I timidly reached out my hand and shook that one finger she had sticking out. It didn't take a Mariners fan to recognize her father's name because he was the best of the best when it came to baseball managers, carrying with him a legacy of turning sub-.500 teams into World Series Champions within a few years.

"I'm Edward. Edward Cullen. Son of two wonderful and successful people but not really anybody special myself."

She smiled sadly. "You and I have something in common, Edward. I may have a famous father, but I'm not really anybody special, either, so don't treat me that way, please."

Her eyes held a plea, begging me to see her as a normal person with only a famous parent, and for some reason, I felt bad for instantly going to the place that it seemed so many people did. So, plastering on my best smile, feeling a little of my confidence come creeping back however forced it was, I leaned in. "Are you hinting that you and I will be seeing more of each other?"

_Say yes. Say yes. Say yes._

"Maybe," she smirked. "As long as you help me carry the rest of this shit up to my room."

Immediately grabbing a box from the trunk, supporting it on the bottom to insure we didn't have any more messes, I said, "That's better than a 'no'. Point me in the direction I'm headed, Sailor Swan."

* * *

"I'm Jasper Hale, an incoming freshman majoring in history."

A tall, gangly kid with curly blonde hair and a southern accent thicker than molasses on a winter's day was standing in front of me with his hand formally extended out in front of him. I had to bite back a laugh.

"Edward Cullen," I responded, taking his hand and shaking it, trying to loosen up his stiff posture. "Also an incoming freshman that's majoring in everything right now until I find out what I'm good at." I'd been here for six hours already, and since dorm rooms were stereotypically small, I hadn't really brought a whole lot with me, so I was already unpacked and settled. "I hope you don't mind, but since I was the first to arrive, I went ahead and chose a bed. I took the far wall."

"Nah," he drawled. "I don't mind where I sleep. Comes with the territory of being an Army brat. I've moved around so much that any flat surface can be considered a bed to me. But since I have the pick between two equally uncomfortable-looking beds, I'll choose the middle one."

"You sure do have a distinct accent for moving around so much," I noted.

He shrugged as he unzipped his large camouflage bag. "Even though we've lived all around the world, I spent the first twelve years of my life living between the Fort Hood and Fort Bliss bases in Texas. I guess those are the formative years. The accent just kind of stuck with me and my sister."

"You have a sister?"

"Yep, a twin sister, in fact. She's going here, too. Our mother Maria is downstairs helping her unpack because ninety percent of the stuff in the Hummer belonged to her."

Just then a large dude with biceps the size of Jasper's thigh came barreling through our opened door with six Nike duffel bags slung over his shoulders.

"Is this Campion Hall, and is this Room 813?"

"Uhhhh, yeah," I answered.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph," he huffed, instantly dropping the bags from his arms to the carpeted concrete slab, sending a thunderous rumble through the room. "This campus is so fucking confusing. I've been south when I thought it was north and east when I thought it was west. I'm so happy that I finally found it."

"I'm Edward, undecided major," I said, putting my hand out for a shake. "This is Jasper, history major. We're your roommates for the next year."

"Emmett McCarty," he replied, gripping our hands roughly. "Chemistry major and Seattle University's next big soccer star."

Surprised that he wasn't a dumb jock even though that was the air he gave off, I asked, "What made you choose chemistry?"

He smirked. "I was undecided until I ran into this feisty blonde in the elevator. While my tongue was down her throat, I swiped her course schedule that was resting on the top of a crate."

Laughing, he picked up his bags again and headed for the remaining empty bed, obviously not having a problem where he slept. "First, I better switch all of my classes from general education, and second, I need to start brushing up on the period table if I plan to pass." He was already occupied now, pulling out his clothes and shoes, but I swore I heard him muttering, "Oxygen, nitrogen, water, fluoride, salt, moron... I got this."

_Period Table? Water, fluoride and salt? Moron?_

Moron indeed. This was going to be an interesting year.

* * *

"I could eat a grizzly bear I'm so hungry," Emmett groaned, clutching his stomach on our ride down in the elevator to the basement cafeteria. "Let's hope the food in this place is worth the meal plan we had to buy."

"Word is we should steer clear of the hot dog bake tonight, but the lasagna is a go," Jasper added.

The doors dinged a second later after the short trip, and once fully opened, we gasped as we took in the beauty of food station after food station jam-packed with mystery items slathered in chunky red gunk and gelatinous brown gunk and processed yellow gunk resembling melted cheese. My stomach growled in anticipation, loudly echoing throughout the metal box we were still standing in.

"_Feed me some of the red and the yellow, please,"_ it begged before breaking out into a cheer. _"Red and yellow! Red and yellow!"_

"I've never seen anything so beautiful," Emmett play-cried, wiping a fake tear from his eye.

"I spot pizza," Jasper announced like a ship lookout spotting land, pointing his finger straight ahead.

Practically lunging out of the elevator in a beeline for wholesome goodness to fill our aching, manly bellies, we crashed right into three giggling girls rounding the corner to get on the elevator. Blonde and brunette hair went a-flying as well as arms a-flailing up into the air. Being the gentleman we all are apparently, our hands quickly shot out and grasped their upper arms in a last ditch effort to keep them on their feet, and luckily we were all successful.

Once the girls were done screaming their pretty little heads off, so much more of an exaggeration than what the situation called for, they finally opened their eyes and were able to see their knights in shining armor.

"Edward!"

"Bella."

"Emmett!"

"Rosaliiiiieeee."

"How do you know my sister, Emmett?"

"You have a sister?"

"You're my brother's roommate?"

"How do you know my roommate, Rose?"

"I'm Alice."

"I'm Jasper, ma'am. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"You're Rosalie's twin brother?"

"Twins. Niiiiiice."

"Brother and sister twins, pervert."

"Rosalie told us all about you. I had no idea you were so cute."

"Why thank you. You're awfully cute yourself and very tiny."

"Four feet eleven inches. Not a hair taller or shorter."

"Care for a repeat of earlier, baby?"

"How the _fuck_ do you know my sister?"

Still holding onto Bella's arms, I pulled her gently away from the group, afraid that what was still somewhat innocent was about to become very ugly. Rosalie was obviously the blonde that Emmett had hooked up with in the elevator earlier, and we were about five seconds away from Jasper realizing that. And I didn't want Bella caught in the crossfire.

"Did you already eat?" I asked, sitting at an empty table against the wall, far from the argument that was brewing.

She sat across from me. "Yeah, we came down a little early because we had worked up an appetite with helping Rosalie unpack. That girl came prepared for every situation. I'm pretty sure our room could be used as a fallout shelter in a nuclear war. I swear she brought a five year supply of every item."

I laughed. "Jasper said that his sister's stuff took up most of their Hummer. Maybe the over-preparedness comes from being the daughter of someone in the Army."

"Possibly."

I couldn't really tell if it was real or if it was just me, but an awkwardness seemed to fall over us as the silence crept in. I'm pretty sure it was only a few seconds, but those few seconds were enough to make my heart race... because out of nowhere I grew some massive balls, and I was about to take a giant leap into this whole making the first move thing... with a real live college girl... and I had no idea what I was doing.

"So," I began, clearing my throat. "I was wondering if maybe you wanted to eat dinner with me."

"I told you I already ate," she said, tilting her head so that she was looking at me like I was crazy.

"Yeah, of course..." I stammered. "I mean some other time. Like this weekend... or whenever you're available. Not here. Somewhere else. A nice place where there are menus and waiters to wait on you. And I'd let you buy the most expensive thing they offered because I'm a nice guy like that. Oh, and we could get dessert... or coffee... or hot tea if you don't like coffee..."

During the entire time I was speaking, I searched her face, looking for signs of excitement or happiness. A smile. A sparkle in her eye. I got neither. This was not good.

"Ummm... I'm sorry," she grimaced. Nope. Definitely not good. "I probably should have said something earlier, like when you were helping me carry stuff, but I didn't want to come off as one of _those_ girls that just assumes..."

And that's where she stopped. My eyes scrunched together as I tried to decipher what that was supposed to mean. Was this some girl code? Was she going to finish the sentence or was that it?

"What?"

She took a deep breath. "You're a really nice guy, Edward, but I'm sort of seeing someone."

"Yeah, yeah, sure! I understand!" I quickly nodded my head. "I'm sort of seeing someone, too."

"_Are not, loser,"_ my brain interjected.

Bella did that cute little head tilt thing again. She was trying to figure out why in the hell I just asked her out if I had a girlfriend.

"_Backtrack! Backtrack!"_

"I was just seeing if you wanted to go out as friends. Friends only. Uhhhh..." Darting my eyes around the room, searching for something, anything, to save my ass, they landed on a magazine lying on the table next to us featuring this new show called Project Runway on the cover. "Heidi... my girlfriend... she wants me to make loads of friends – both boys and girls – so that my college experience is more fulfilling."

She smiled. "Heidi sounds like a sweet girlfriend to have that much trust in you. You must be a very good guy if she isn't worried about what would come of such friendships – _with girls_. She sounds very mature. Is she still in high school?"

"Yeah, yeah. She's a senior where I went to high school in this town west of here called Forks. She's great. Moving away was very difficult on both of us, but we're going to try to make it work this year until she graduates."

I could not stop lying no matter how hard I tried. My nose used to be pretty damn perfect if I do say so myself with maybe just the slightest curve from that one time I broke it when I caught a fly ball with my face in summer league baseball. But right about now it was almost poking her in the eye.

"I know what you mean about trying to make it work. My boyfriend James is going to Arizona State while I'm up here. We met in school in Phoenix when my dad was the manager for the Diamondbacks, and I really wanted to graduate with my friends and be with James as long as I could, so I stayed with my mom through June long after my dad had already moved. But mom got remarried at the end of May... so here I am in Seattle near my dad."

"Do you not like the guy? Your mom's new husband?" I asked. "Is that why you moved up here?"

"Oh, no, that's not it. I mean, it's a little weird but only because Phil was one of dad's players in Phoenix, but my parents divorced several years ago. It was definitely not an affair or anything. Renee and Phil met through me, and now they're enjoying newlywed life, and I wanted to give them that time together minus me."

"Bella!" we both turned our heads to see Rosalie and Alice skidding to a stop by our table, about to burst with excitement. "They asked us out!" they screamed in unison.

"Emmett and Jasper?" I asked, surprised that the argument didn't escalate into a full-blown fist fight with how agitated Jasper seemed.

"Yes!" Alice squealed. "We're going out this weekend. Me with Jasper. Rosalie with Emmett. You two should join us as like a triple date or something."

Not moving my head but looking sideways, I saw Bella doing the same thing while biting down on her bottom lip. "As friends?" I asked. After a few seconds of no answer, she nodded her head, and the girls squealed again. In a flash, she was gone, being dragged toward the elevator with her hands in theirs.

Standing from the plastic chair, I walked over to the trays and plates by the guys and started loading up on red and yellow as my mind wandered.

Bella had a boyfriend. I had to settle for the _friend_ thing with her. I could do that. Sure. It wouldn't be a problem. I'd been friends with girls before. Okay... one girl. And then I had sex with her and we weren't friends anymore... but that was her fault that it got awkward. She had only herself to blame that she always imagined me naked after it happened. I imagined her naked long before we got naked together, and I was able to function properly throughout the day minus the random boner here and there.

Now I was imagining Bella naked.

And I had a boner.

Bella and Edward. Edward and Bella. Friends only. BFFs. This was going to be great. Except for the fact that I wanted to make out with my BFF... and let her touch my boner.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

So, what do you think? This should be fun, shouldn't it? Now don't get ahead of yourselves, lovelies. Do you think I'd write a complete fluff piece? Oh hell no. There is OF COURSE a twist. mwahahahaha! But let's sit back and see how we get from September 2004 to the Prologue. It's going to be... interesting.

**_*Disclaimer:_** I realize that some of you may be Seattle University students/alumni. Please understand that I have researched your school and its policies to the point that I could be one of you, but saying that, I'm taking my own liberties with your fine university. There are places I'll mention that you may recognize and some that you won't, but that's because I'm combining your university with mine so that I can visualize it better. Forgive me?

**Check my profile for updates on when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there - one completed fic and two one-shots.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	2. Chapter 2 Still Sept 2004

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:** Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. This chapter is much better because of your guidance. Go check out her story Inamorata! Unf!

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

* * *

**CHAPTER**** 2**

_Still__ September__ 2004_

There was this rumor-slash-scientifically-proven theory going around that if you sat in the front row of a classroom or down the middle rows, you would learn more than those that sat elsewhere. Supposedly it had something to do with increased eye contact and interaction with the teacher. I couldn't have told you if it was true or not, but either way, I didn't really care. That was why you could find me in the back row, nestled comfortably in the corner by the window... ready to jump out.

It wasn't that I didn't want to learn about the stimulating inner workings of America's government. It was just that this class seemed to be leaning more toward a never-ending, never-getting-anywhere heated debate rather than educating us on how our country was run.

I guess that was what I got for enrolling in this course during a presidential election.

Never once in one of my high school classes had one student even cared enough to argue a topic the teacher proposed. This college stuff was a whole different ballgame, though, consisting of sometimes-intelligent, always-opinionated people that wanted to make an impression on whoever was impressionable. It was all a bit too much for my eighteen year old mind to process at nine o'clock in the morning, and we were only on day three of the class.

It had occurred to me to drop it and take it another year. In fact, in my backpack next to my feet was a yellow slip of paper, filled out with the appropriate information to do just that. It had been there since day one, and all I had to do was walk down three flights of stairs to the registrar's office so it could be filed. But there was a reason I hadn't turned it in. And that reason was the girl sitting next to me.

I was possibly the luckiest guy in the world. What were the chances that out of all of the classes offered in that time slot, Bella enrolled in the exact same one that I'd chosen? It had to be fate. God or Jesus or somebody was trying to tell us something.

And that something was that we should hook up.

_Now__, __how __to__ convince _her _of __that__?_

Leaning across the small aisle, I placed my lips by her ear so that she could hear me. "I don't think we'll make it to midterm without them killing each other." A smile played with the corner of her mouth as she tried to hold her laughter in at the sight before us.

The guy, batting for the conservatives, had just uttered the immature "flip-flopper!" accusation for the umpteenth time at the girl, the diehard liberal, and she'd retorted with "military deserter!" in a screech that hurt my ears. Needless to say, it was going to be a long semester... but it was going to be worth all the headaches to get to spend a little bit more time with _her_.

"Nothing beats a good political debate to get the blood pumping in the morning," the professor enthusiastically interrupted the noise in the front row, _naturally._ "But our time is up, so that's it for today. We'll pick this discussion back up on Friday."

Several miserable groans joined in with the rustling of textbooks being shoved into bags as the professor collected his briefcase and coffee mug with the heads of all of our nation's presidents adorned on its curve and headed out of the door before any of us could beat him. He enjoyed his job a little too much and most of us hated him for it. He was too peppy to be causing us such pain and agony.

"So, how's Heidi?"

Snapping my head up from rummaging through the bottom of my bag for the pencil I'd dropped, I met Bella's eyes and stared at her for a few seconds in confusion before it hit me she was asking about my imaginary girlfriend.

"She's great!" I blurted out. "Wonderful. Outstanding. Never better."

"I take it she's handling your being away at college well, then?"

"Oh yeah. She's a real trooper. We talk every night on the phone for hours. She tells me about her day, and I tell her about mine, and it's like our routine has never changed even though I'm no longer just on the other side of town."

The smile never disappeared from Bella's face as we walked out into the crowded hallway, but the sparkle in her eyes did. I barely knew her besides what she'd revealed, but something was up. Her eyes, the same eyes that had trapped me in the dorm parking lot, were a window into her thoughts, and they were telling me that what I'd said upset her. But why?

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," she replied too quickly, shaking her head yet biting her bottom lip as she looked down at the steps below her feet.

Stopping on the landing between the second and third floor of the building, I turned her toward me. "Your eyes are too honest. Tell me."

She smiled and rolled her honest eyes. "This is one of those moments where I'm a stereotypical girl. These moments are few and far between with me, just so you're aware."

Girl code, again. "And that means?"

"I'm jealous," she whispered, moving closer to me like she didn't want anybody else to hear.

She could have been telling me some huge state secret, but all I could focus on was how good she smelled. Like soap and hair products from that smelly place in the mall. She must have showered in the morning which meant she was naked... being sprayed with water. And a lot of other naked girls were being sprayed with water next to her. _Fuck__._

"James promised we'd talk every day, and I haven't heard from him since Sunday. I talk to his voicemail when I wake up, and I talk to his voicemail before I go to sleep. That doesn't count all the times in between. I'm turning into a crazed stalker."

"No, you're just being a girlfriend wondering what her boyfriend is doing," I countered, sort of pissed off. I knew guys, mostly because I was one, and not talking to your girl for three whole days was never a good thing.

James and Bella were over a thousand miles apart, and I had a hunch that only one person was still in their relationship one hundred percent, and that person was standing in front of me with a look on her face begging me to tell her what my thoughts were on this situation. Because I was her _friend_ and that's what friends did.

But she couldn't know what my thoughts really were. Not when they were bound to hurt her. And definitely not when I wasn't positive, though I was damn near close enough.

"I'm sure there is nothing wrong. Maybe he's gotten a lot of homework, and he's too busy to call or answer his phone. Don't start worrying, yet, okay? It's only been a few days."

What a load of crap. A few days in teen years was an eternity, but whatever I said seemed to do the trick. The sparkle was back in those coffee-colored eyes of hers, and we headed down the rest of the stairs, only inches apart.

"I never said anything before, but this weekend was really great," she smiled as I opened the door for her so we could walk outside. "Thanks for making the triple date fun when it could have been awkward."

"It _was_ fun. We'll have to do it again if they want to."

"We most certainly will."

We stopped at the fork in the sidewalk, and I knew this was where we parted ways. She would go left toward her speech class, and I would go right, back to the dorm.

"Maybe I'll see you in the cafeteria tonight," I said, fidgeting with the straps on my backpack. What else was I supposed to do with my hands? I had some ideas, but those were socially unacceptable in public.

"Probably," she replied with a wink as she took a step backward to leave my side. "It's Mexican night again. Can't miss out on their dozens of items consisting of some kind of beef mixture, beans from last Mexican night, yellow cheese product and stale tortillas."

"Mmmmmmm..." I hummed in approval. It still sounded good to me.

"Bye, Edward."

"Bye, Bella."

I turned to head back to Campion Hall, probably not getting more than five feet in the opposite direction, and I heard a cell phone ring and an excited squeal follow only seconds later. I didn't need to turn around to know who it was.

"_Hi__, __honey__! __I__ was __just __talking __about __you__! __I__ miss __you__ so __much__... __Awwww__! __I __love __you__, __too__."_

Bella's boyfriend was smooth. No doubt about it.

Players always are.

**

* * *

AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

I'd love to hear what you think so far! Next chapter we're jumping through time a little to January 2005. Each update is a flashback, and each flashback will bring us closer to the events of the prologue and beyond. I'm having a blast writing this. FYI, I've gotten 13 chapters written so far, so expect at least one update per week for a while.

Sorry I haven't responded to reviews of the first chapter. I was fail this time because I'm so backed up on responding to reviews for the final epi of FYA and the o/s's. You'll be hearing from me soon, though! I promise.

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	3. Chapter 3 January 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**SURPRISE! Early post!**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. She got this back to me super quick! Go check out her story Inamorata! Unf!

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

**

* * *

CHAPTER 3**

_January 2005_

"You look pretty hot with a guitar, Edward."

"What was that?" I asked with a raise of my eyebrow.

"I'm not going to repeat myself, asshole. You heard me perfectly the first time."

"My, my. How I missed that mouth of yours, Bella."

The loudest snort came out of this girl as she flopped back on Alice's stretched out legs on top of the bed. It had been three weeks and two days since we'd all been together like this. One very short yet very long three weeks and two days.

On one hand, Christmas Break could take its sweet time and drag out those days before the beginning of a new semester because we all knew that downtime was a luxury that was depleting rather quickly as the end of our schooling days was in sight. On the other, over the course of my first college semester, my friendships with the five people in the room had grown into close friendships, and though I never would have admitted this to them, I missed them while they were away.

Emmett went home to Tennessee, Alice headed that way but went further south to Mississippi to her family, Jasper and Rosalie headed down Interstate 5 to their parent's house near Fort Lewis and Bella went back to Phoenix to visit her mother, stepfather and boyfriend.

We all had our places to go, myself included as I drove home to Forks to stay with mom and dad for the duration of the break, but I'd been anxious to get back to Seattle. Independence had its downsides, but there were very few in comparison to the upsides of being detached from constant parental authority.

"Who got you the guitar?" Bella asked. "Your parents or Heidi?"

"My parents. Heidi got me a sweater and a gift card."

Yep, I'd become an old pro at my imaginary girlfriend by that point. I figured as long as Bella had a boyfriend, I would have a girlfriend. I wasn't going to be some loser.

Even the guys thought Heidi existed. Thank God they didn't pry into my personal life too much, all thanks to their own distractions named Rosalie and Alice, or they'd have seen my almost-nightly phone calls were to 411, and the girl in my wallet could be found on page three of Google images under the search "hot high school chicks."

Jesus, I _was_ a loser.

See, this was why you didn't lie. All it takes is for that lie to grow wings, and you've got yourself a real flying lying problem. And with no end in sight of James and Bella's relationship, I was in a real mess.

The guy didn't have me fooled for a second, much the opposite of Bella. Days passed between their phone calls, and when he did call her, he only had "a few minutes" to chat. What an ass. But could I tell her that James most likely had a girl in both cities? No. Of course not. Why? Because she loved him. At least she loved the guy that she thought was loyal to her. No matter how much I wanted her to myself, I couldn't make her cry, and that kind of news always ended in tears. And crying girls made my stomach hurt.

You want to know something, though? Girls set themselves up to cry by the sheer number of stupid situations they willingly stumble into.

Example number one: Trusting your nineteen year old boyfriend to keep his dick in his pants when he knows you are three states away and have no idea what he's doing or who he's screwing.

Example number two: Allowing your boyfriend to get away with calling you at his leisure. Hello? He never answers his phone when you call. That should tell you something right there!

Example number three: Getting your boyfriend of three years a present for Christmas but telling him it was okay that he "forgot" to get _you_ something.

Example number f–

"Edward?" Emmett said, interrupting my freight train of thought. "Ease up on the neck of that guitar. You're strangling it to death."

Taking a deep breath, I blinked away the fury in my eyes and stretched my fingers out to loosen the tightened tendons. That beautiful, oblivious girl giggling on the bed with Rosalie and Alice sure got me wound up without even trying. And she was oblivious for more reasons than one.

"Play us something, E," Jasper prodded.

I smiled as they all sat up and watched eagerly as I placed my fingers in random places along the strings and frets and strummed one long, loud, horrible-sounding chord with my right hand.

_My first masterpiece._

"I call it...'Bella's Snorting.'"

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

*giggle* Silly Edward.

I'd love to hear what you think so far! I'm very surprised at how many of you are ticked off at Edward for making up Heidi. I wasn't expecting that to be honest, and if I'm not mistaken, you want Edward to learn a good, hard lesson. I'll see what I can do about that. Thank you so much for the reviews!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	4. Chapter 4 April 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**I updated Chapter 3 early, so make sure you read that first. Not all alerts went out.  
**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. She got this back to me super quick! Go check out her story Inamorata! Unf!

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

**

* * *

CHAPTER**** 4**

_April__ 2005_

"Oh my God! Oh! My! God!"

Emmett didn't have an inside voice when he was freaking out. He also didn't have any shame. Not in running down a hallway with his pants around his ankles. Not in telling everyone that he takes his laptop with him when he poops. Not even in embarrassing one of his closest friends... namely me.

"Your girlfriend!" he shouted as soon as he ran up to us in the overflowing dining hall with a point of his finger at his laptop. Every eye had already been on him as he so loudly stumbled through the large room, but now they were directed toward a very familiar blonde girl on his screen.

_This __was__ not __happening__._

Raucous laughter and gossip erupted around me as I sat there in stunned silence watching who I thought was my innocent imaginary girlfriend get her ass pounded on a pool lounger by some mystery man with large hairy balls and a disproportionately small dick.

"Is that you?" Jasper snorted, grabbing the laptop from Emmett's hands to take a closer look.

_This__ was __SO __not __happening_.

If there ever was a time to come clean, that moment was most definitely it.

* * *

Leaning into the wall of the elevator, placing all of my weight onto my back, I hoped that it would give way and let me fall to an untimely death. Death would have been better than the mortification I suffered through in telling all of them the truth about "Heidi."

Emmett and Jasper laughed hysterically until the time they left, Alice shook her head and pursed her lips in disappointment, though I was pretty sure she was laughing earlier, and Rosalie may have laughed harder than anybody else combined. But then there was Bella. She hadn't really said much except for asking a few questions here and there as I explained.

"Are you mad at me?"

"I think the universe is mad enough, Edward. Considering you'll be the laughing stock of the dorm at least until the end of the school year, I'm pretty sure I'm all you've got left to stick up for you."

"So you're truly not mad?" I turned my head so I could stare at her actual face since the shiny metal doors had opened and I couldn't see her warped reflection anymore. I wished the doors hadn't opened. Her reflection was safer.

"No," she said, taking a step out. "But let's go with honesty from now on, okay? No more lies."

"No more lies," I sighed. "I promise."

She nodded her head and went to take a step away from the entrance and its impatient door, but she stopped. "Why did you lie about Heidi to begin with?"

I stared at her for a few moments, lost in her questioning eyes. Did I tell her the truth, the truth that I just promised I'd always give her, or did I lie again? I wasn't sure which was worse.

"Honestly?" I asked, giving myself another second to think it through.

"Honestly, Edward. You promised."

I did._ Then__ here __goes__ nothing__..._ "I liked you. I got embarrassed that I asked you out and you rejected me."

"Oh," she whispered almost too low to hear over the buzzing of the elevator. "And now? Did you keep up the lie because you still like me?"

Her eyes were searching my face, trying to find the answer before I could speak it, and I'd never felt so naked in my entire life than in that moment. Maybe she could read my eyes just as well as I could read hers. That had never occurred to me before. Had she known all along? And did it really matter what I said now?

Stretching my hand toward the silver buttons on the opposite wall, I pushed my floor and smiled at her as the doors slid shut.

"We're just friends, Bella."

It wasn't a lie.

**

* * *

AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

So... Do you feel bad for Edward? Feel like he got what he deserved? Feel like he has the shittiest luck ever? I'd love to know what you're thinking!

Thank you to everybody for reading and thank you to those that have taken the time to review! I appreciate your words!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	5. Chapter 5 June 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. Go check out her story Inamorata and meet Peeper.

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

**

* * *

CHAPTER**** 5**

_June__ 2005_

Bella and I stood in the doorway of her dorm room, leaning on opposite sides of the frame, staring at the quiet space. The clothes were gone. The photographs were gone. The computers, the pink twinkle lights, the rug and the beanbag chair... all gone. Besides the cold concrete blocks and the neutral carpet, the only things that remained were the three beds and three desks that were there when they first came. But just like the rest of the room, they were void of previous character and personalization.

Everything that had been comfortable – everything that had made our temporary living quarters feel more like a home – had been stuffed away in a car, ready to be stacked in a garage for a few months until it was all useful again. Until we came back.

For most, it was only time to say goodbye for the summer, but for some, it was time to say goodbye forever. A somberness, foreign to what was normally found, had taken over every student that walked through the halls with their parents. I knew I was lucky, though. All six of us were. We were all returning next semester, and though we would have different dorm assignments, I didn't think it would have any effect on our friendships.

"Thank you for being my friend this year," Bella murmured, coming in for a hug against my side. Hooking my arm around her, I pulled her tighter, because behind her words was a slight hint of finality that I could not understand.

"This agreement wasn't for one year, just so you know."

She relaxed, exhaling against my t-shirt, sprouting goosebumps under the warmed circle of the material. "I hoped it wasn't."

"_Edward__! __Your__ mom__ says __they__'__re __ready __to __go__!"_

Arching back, I released Bella from under my arm and looked down the hallway toward the stairwell to see Emmett standing there with Jasper.

"Did you check our room to make sure we got it all?"

"Yep, we're good," Jasper replied.

"Well, okay," I said, taking a deep breath and shoving my hands into my pocket as Bella and I stood there looking at each other. "Guess I gotta go. See you in three months?"

"Three months," she whispered, forcing a small smile. "Goodbye, Edward."

"Be safe, Bella."

My tummy hurt. I was pretty sure those were tears in her eyes.

**

* * *

AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

I want to apologize for the chapters being shorter, but I did warn you ;) I promise the chapters will start to get longer as time goes along. Next chapter is quite a bit longer, actually. But as one reviewer said, I say what I need to and get out. These are flashbacks of only the most important things in their lives, and as Edward and Bella get closer, more things will be worth talking about. Please don't hate me, yet.

Thank you to everybody for reading and thank you to those that have taken the time to review. I appreciate your words.

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	6. Chapter 6 September 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. Go check out her story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

**

* * *

**

**CHAPTER**** 6**

_September__ 2005_

"On the count of three, I want you to open your eyes. And no peeking until then, Emmett. I know how you work. Okay. One... Two... Two and a half... _Emmett__..._ Three!"

Already looking down at my hands in anticipation, my eyes shot open and fell upon a thick strip of paper resting in my flattened palms. It took me only a second to realize what I held due to the large image and logo printed across it, and I lit up with excitement.

_Hell__ yes__._

Being Bella Swan's friend sure had its advantages.

* * *

"Wow! This is so cool!" Jasper exclaimed, looking out over the expanse of immaculately manicured grass of Safeco Field, home of the Seattle Mariners. Bella had spoken with her father, the team's manager, and as a welcome back to our sophomore year of college, she'd gotten us all tickets to today's game in the front row right behind the home dugout.

"You got everything you need?" he asked, standing at the railing below.

"I think so. Just give us a win, coach!" she smiled, and he gave her a wink in return, an act that seemed like it was their special thing as father and daughter.

"That's what I do best, baby."

He turned to walk back toward the mound to speak with the starting pitcher for the game, and Alice and Rosalie yelled out, "Thank you, Mr. Swan!" before he could get too far. We echoed their thanks, and he waved us off as if it was no big deal he'd gotten us these amazing tickets and VIP parking for free.

Once he was fully gone, the girls stayed standing, their elbows resting on the front protective railing, the perfect position for us to stare at their asses, and we rested back into our seats to take in the view.

It was the perfect day for a baseball game. The retractable roof was back, the temperature was mild and the sun was shining down on the players warming up... players the girls were drooling over.

"_I__'__ve __had __a __crush__ on __Paul __over __at __shortstop __since __my __dad __took __over __the __team__. __He__'__s__ married__, __but __that__ doesn__'__t __mean __I__ have __to __stop __sneaking __peeks__ of __those__ broad__ shoulders__ of __his__."_

"So, have I told you how much I hate my new roommate Eric?" I spoke loudly, trying to drown out Bella talking about another man.

"You've mentioned it a few dozen times," Emmett laughed.

"Well, this guy is a total nerd. He's going to drive me nuts with his nerd talk. It's NASA this and NASA that, and he actually decorated the entire room including _my_ bedside table with models of rockets and shuttles and posters of space."

"_Look __at __number __seven__'__s __ass __in __those __pants__,"_ Rosalie whispered, pointing to the first baseman. _"__My__ goodness__, __his __mama __blessed __him__. __I__ just __want __to __squeeze__ those __cheeks__."_

"I hate that we didn't get approved to keep the same dorm assignments as what we had last year," Jasper spoke even louder than I had. "All of us got along so great. I don't hate this new roommate or anything, but he's definitely not fun like you guys were."

"We should rent our own place together next year since we won't have to stay in the dorms anymore," Emmett concluded. "The girls are doing it. Why shouldn't we?"

"_Oh__, __check __out __the __catcher __guy__,"_ Alice moaned quietly. _"__That__'__s__ a__ helluva __bulge__. __Do __you__ think__ that__'__s __all __cup__ or __all __man__?"_

"_All__ cup__,"_ Bella and Rosalie snorted.

"Ummmm...hello?" Jasper finally interrupted. "You do know we're sitting right here and can hear everything you're saying, right? Does having boyfriends mean anything to you?"

"Of course it does," Alice cooed, grabbing his jaw with her hand and kissing him squarely on the mouth. "We're only looking, not touching. The touching is reserved for you."

Rosalie groaned, sitting in Emmett's lap. "TMI, Alice. I sometimes think you forget he's my brother."

As the discussion went on, a hand appeared in mine pulling me out of the chair, and I glanced up to see Bella standing there. "I'm thirsty. Help me get some drinks to bring back?"

The walk up the stairs was long, but I could have walked them forever just to watch her hips sway from side to side the way they did with each step. She was wearing those same tiny navy blue shorts she was wearing a year ago when I met her, but this time they were paired with a tight white Mariners t-shirt and a teal ribbon holding her hair in a ponytail. Wispy pieces had fallen down over the course of the afternoon's tailgating, and the light breeze that had picked up had them brushing delicately along the skin of her cheeks and neck.

_What __I__ would __give __to __be __those __strands __of __hair __right __now__..._

When we reached the concession stand, the line was long but not horrible. If it went fast enough, we'd be back in time for the start of the first inning. If not, we'd only miss a batter or two. So we stood patiently and read the menu board hanging above.

"Should we get an assortment? A couple Pepsis? A couple Mountain Dews? A couple bottles of water?" she asked.

"Sounds alright with me. I'll drink whatever."

Taking a step forward to keep up with the moving line, she turned toward me. "Did I hear you guys are thinking about renting a place of your own next year?"

"Yeah. New roommate trouble. I don't think we really want to gamble again next year on who we'd end up with."

"I hear ya. Don't get me wrong. My new roommate Angela is a great person. She's this amazing photographer and as sweet as can be, but I miss Alice and Rosalie already. Plus, she snores like a man."

A few feet away, in the line running parallel to ours, I heard the distinct sound of a cat call, so I turned in the direction of the sound to see two guys staring at Bella with smirks on their faces.

"Can I help you?" she asked, a little bit annoyed.

"Is this your boyfriend?" one asked, looking over at me before glancing down at her chest and licking his lips.

I got it. I really did. Her boobs were outstanding in that shirt, all perky and perfectly-sized, but there was no way in hell I was going to stand there and let some random dude make such a disgusting, unwanted pass at her.

"I think it's time you shut the hell up and leave her alone," I growled.

"So, you _are _her boyfriend," he stated matter-of-factly with no question, sizing me up and down with his eyes. He wanted a fight.

"Don't," she whispered, taking hold of my arm that flexed. "They're not worth it."

Sure, I was beyond pissed that they were treating Bella like a piece of meat that they could eat, but they were also judging my worthiness of her. That didn't sit well with me.

"Oh they're worth it, Bella."

"Don't be ridiculous," she grumbled, putting herself in between all of us.

"Does your girlfriend always fight your battles for you?"

"He's not my boyfriend," she sneered, wounding me with the truth, "but he is my friend, and I believe you should take his advice. Shut the hell up, and leave me alone. I don't want you. I don't need you. I don't even find you attractive."

A low _"Oooooohhhhh"_ came from the crowd around us, all of their antennas having picked up the signal of a rumble in their vicinity in the last minute and a half.

"Did you expect me to strip off my clothes and start fucking both of you here in the middle of all of these people because you made that grand gesture of whistling at me? You've been staring at my tits pretty hardcore, but I'm sure the place below is what you're aiming for ultimately. But you know what they say. I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

They both looked at each other in shock and took a step back out of the line, eliciting laughter from the group of guys behind them.

"I'm waiting," she said, waving her hands toward their pants while tapping her foot. "The game is about to start. I haven't got all day. Get to whipping those big dicks out so I can get back down there in time to watch my dad coach the Mariners to a W."

Yep, that was all it took. Every eye that had been witnessing Bella dominate was then on those two assholes' backs as they took off down the concourse, muttering about her being crazy. Too bad they didn't know beforehand that Bella was a badass. I knew she had some toughness in her, but damn. That was kind of hot in an I-just-got-owned-but-my-girl-can-handle-herself sort of way.

Turning around, she clasped her hands together in front of her and smiled a triumphant grin. Then she looked up at the menu board again and nodded. "I think we should get a Dr. Pepper, too."

**

* * *

AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

See, that chapter was a little longer :) For those that have stuck around, next chapter and beyond are about to get a lot juicier. We had to do a little setting up before the fun began and the changes started happening.

Thank you to everybody for reading and thank you to those that have taken the time to review. I appreciate your words.

_Disclaimer:_ I was Eric in college. I'm allowed to make fun of myself, and I will continue to do so for the remainder of the school year. I'm a NASA nerd and proud of it, so don't get offended.

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	7. Chapter 7 November 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. Go check out her story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

**

* * *

CHAPTER**** 7**

_November__ 2005_

First things first. I love food. Greasy food, healthy food, food that shouldn't be food but looks and tastes like food. All kinds.

It can comfort a rumbling belly. It can give you strength when you're weak. It can even turn a frown upside down. Okay, maybe that had nothing to do with the food. Maybe it all had to do with the person you were dining alongside.

You see, I loved Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays because I just so happened to have a free hour at noon, just like my friend Bella. It was purely coincidental it worked out that way, a convenient little happenstance of sorts that occurred when we set up our class schedules last semester. There was no shady business at all to get that to work out. Zero shenanigans. None. Alright... some. But that was okay because she seemed to enjoy my company.

Her favorite place to hit was this cafeteria on the second floor of the student center. There were always a variety of items to choose from, and it was closer to her next class than the dorm dining hall would have been. Did it matter I had to haul ass all the way across campus to make it five minutes late to mine? Nah. I enjoyed the exercise. It kept off the pounds.

So did my eager sprint up the steps to meet her.

The tables were packed as I wound my way through the maze of pushed back chairs and inconveniently-dropped backpacks. Our usual spot near the windows was occupied by a group of professors from the physics department, so I spun in place and looked out over the tops of everyone's heads for hers. And there she was, tucked into the corner with her face buried in a textbook.

"Test this afternoon?" I asked, plopping down across from her.

She shook her head. "No, but I hate being unprepared for this class. This prof likes to throw pop quizzes at us, and it's always from the reading. I swear I should just start reading the side notes and captions under the pictures, though. That seems to be where she gets most of her questions."

Even though she wanted to take the lazy track, I knew she wouldn't. She was a good student no matter what class it was, whether it was for her social work major or a gen ed. Her all- A transcript proved it.

Now, my transcript may not have been as good as hers, mainly because I'd dabbled in a wide range of different topics in my search to find my calling, but it was sitting at a perfectly acceptable 3.15 GPA. It was down to that only because very few courses had been successful in grabbing and holding my attention. And by very few, I meant one.

Intro to Forensic Psychology was fascinating. There were some incredibly fucked up criminals in this world, and getting to pick through their brains and try to read their minds every class was a real trip. Were they insane? Were they only acting like they were insane? Was _I _insane? I didn't know. All I did know was that learning in that class wasn't a chore. I looked forward to every period for more knowledge. That had to mean something.

"Anything in particular you were craving on the menu today?" I asked, standing from the chair to make my way to the lines to order our lunch.

Her eyes lit up. "The chipotle chicken sliders sounded yummy. Oh! But could you ask them to put–"

"Extra cilantro lime mayo on them?" I interrupted, knowing exactly where she was going.

She giggled. "You know me too well."

"Nah," I countered. "There's still loads to learn."

* * *

"I'm so full," she groaned, staring down at the one remaining slider she had left on her plate plus the dozen or so fries.

First glancing down at my empty plate, I looked back at hers in longing. Bella had been right about the extra sauce. Those miniature sandwiches were the shit with that stuff thickly slathered on every square inch of buttery toasted bun. "Are you gonna...?"

"It's yours," she stated, sliding her plate toward me with a relief to get it out of her face.

Grabbing it in my clutches immediately, I went to take a bite just as her cell phone started ringing. I laughed inwardly as she pulled out her brand new hot pink Motorola Razr. Sure, the Razr was awesome, but pink? Bella was a such a girl sometimes.

"Hey, babe," she smiled after flipping it open, her uncomfortable grimace disappearing in an instant. _Barf__._

James' voice was a little too quiet and muffled by the phone's speakers, so I couldn't quite tell what he was saying, but it wasn't all that good by the way her body began to sag back down into her chair like she was deflating.

"Oh, okay... Well, I guess if you're going to be too busy then I'll– No. No, I'm not mad. I mean, I didn't even know you were looking for a job, but I'm happy you got one... It'll be fine. Mom had said she wanted to come up here and see the campus and Seattle sometime anyways, so I'll– Oh, alright. Love y–" She pulled the phone in front of her ear to look at the screen and then put it back to her ear again. "Hello?"

"Something wrong?" I asked, licking the mayo off of my fingers.

"That was James," she said quietly, slapping her phone shut. "He was telling me that maybe I should look into a different plan than going to Phoenix for Christmas Break."

"Why?" I replied with a raised eyebrow.

"He said he got a job, and he can't take off any time yet, so we'd barely see each other. He has a point, I guess."

I snorted in disgust. That point was his dick, and he was poking it into somebody else. "Are you mad at him?"

"How could I be mad that he got a job and has obligations?" she murmured. "I'll just do as he suggested. I'll call my mom and see if she can find a flight out of Phoenix to come up here for Christmas instead. James and I have already gone three months without seeing each other. I can go another four. Spring Break will be here before I know it. It's fine."

Maybe if she hadn't hidden her face with the task of stuffing her belongings into her backpack, I'd have believed her, and maybe if her voice hadn't cracked when she said "It's fine," I'd have let it slide. But she did both of those, and I wasn't an asshole.

"Hey," I whispered, grabbing her hand before she could get up to head to class. Turning her head to stare at the way my thumb was brushing across her skin, she sighed and then met my eyes. She looked so defeated. I wanted to punch him for making her look that way.

"I'll be fine. Honestly, Edward. Just give me some time to get over the disappointment... I always do."

"_He__ should__ never __disappoint __you__."_

The whisper came from deep within, from somewhere in my heart, but that was nothing new. My heart whispered a lot. It always said the things that my mouth was too afraid to say out loud.

**

* * *

AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

Awwwwwww! Edward, I think I'm falling in love with you. That boy's feelings sure are changing. He's maturing a little bit, isn't he? And does anybody miss Badass Bella? Noticing a trend there?

Next chapter should be up soon. Probably on Monday. Thank you to the reviewers for getting me past 100 this week! Yay! And thanks to the readers of FYA for getting me past 200,000 hits this week! Very cool!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	8. Chapter 8 December 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**. I'm so happy you had a great time on your vacation! Go check out her story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

* * *

**CHAPTER**** 8**

_December__ 2005_

December in Seattle wasn't the same as December in the rest of the northern part of the country. Other states got walloped with unfathomable snow accumulations and bitingly cold temperatures, but we got constant rain – the kind that ruined your shoes. I wouldn't let it ruin my plans, though.

Christmas was in two days, so I should have been at home with my mom and dad in Forks, but I was back in the city, sitting in the front window of my favorite Starbucks with my steaming cup of Americano, staring out at the people that strolled by lazily.

True Seattleites were easily recognizable on rainy days. They never let the less than ideal weather bother them much. I would have even gone as far to say that if it wasn't for their umbrellas and waterproof outerwear, you might not know it was raining at all.

That being said, though, you could always pick out the tourists, as well.

I snickered as I watched three people dash by the window on their way to the front entrance. They looked like drowned rats, two of them more than the other. Standing from my table as they walked through the door shaking the rain from their hair and jackets and grumbling under their breath about how they missed the sun, I called out to get their attention. "Over here!"

The response I got was more than I expected. A smile, wide and magnetic, lit up Bella's face as she lifted her head. She knew that I wasn't supposed to be in Seattle, but my phone call in the morning to ask her to meet me at Starbucks wasn't the only surprise I had in store.

"What are you doing back?" she asked, walking up to me with the two people accompanying her following behind awkwardly. I stared at them for a second not really wanting to have an audience. "Oh!" she exclaimed after looking over her shoulder. "Edward, this is my mother Renee and her husband Phil. Mom, Phil, this is my friend from school, Edward."

We exchanged uncomfortable pleasantries involving handshakes and small-talk about me knowing Phil because I liked baseball, and then she shooed them off to get coffees so we could talk at the table.

"Are you finally going to tell me why you're back in Seattle?" she asked again.

"Here," I said, unzipping my backpack and placing a small box in front of her clumsily wrapped in red and green and topped with a silver bow.

Her eyebrows scrunched together. "What's this?"

"What does it look like?"

Her head popped up. "You bought me a Christmas present?"

"Not exactly," I explained. "All I bought was the wrapping paper and bow. But, yes, it's a Christmas present for you."

"I feel bad. I didn't get you anything."

"I didn't want anything," I said, shrugging.

She forced a frown as she picked it up and weighed it with her hands, but I could tell she was excited by the sparkle in her eyes. It made me happy that I could do that, and I hoped that excitement would stay after she had opened it. I had my reasons to get her the gift, but she didn't need to know why, partly because I didn't know if it would piss her off or make her sad. If she found out why, it would be one of those two and nothing else, sadly.

"Do you want me to open it now?"

"No," I answered, getting up from my chair while sliding my arms into my jacket. "Wait until Christmas morning. It'll be better then anyways."

"Okay. I'll wait, but are you leaving already? You can stay and finish your drink with us if you'd like."

There was a hopefulness behind her request that tugged me toward my chair again, but looking behind me at the counter, I saw Renee and Phil coming back over with three paper cups in their hands, and I shook my head. "Your mom is here to spend time with you, not me. I'd like to get home before it gets dark anyways."

"Alright then," she resigned, standing up to give me a hug. "Have a good Christmas, Edward."

"You, too, Bella. Hope you like your gift."

"It's from you," she smiled. "I'll love it."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

So, any predictions? What do you think the gift is, and why do you think Edward gave her one? The boy sure does seem to be growing up.

Some of you will be happy to know that I'm working on a future chapter that is probably going to come in around 5000-6000 words :) A normal-sized chapter! Yay! It's a fun one, too...

Thank you all for reading and reviewing!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	9. Chapter 9 Christmas Day 2005

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl **for getting this back to me in one day! Go check out her completed story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, some angst

* * *

**CHAPTER**** 9**

_Christmas__ Day__ 2005_

"Does everything fit?"

"Yep."

"Anything you want me to return?"

"Nope."

"Did we do good this Christmas?"

"Yep."

"Will we ever get you out of your room before you go back to school?"

"Nope."

What did my mother expect from me? Give a man clothes for Christmas, and he'll have something to wear for family pictures later next to the tree. Give a man the new Xbox 360, and you won't see him again until next Christmas when he comes to unwrap more games.

Okay, that was a lie.

In all honesty, the shirts, pants, socks and underwear my parents got me were good. I hadn't really tried anything on because they were all my size and I figured they would fit, but nothing was too ugly for me to wear in public. That was all I cared about.

Mom laughed and rolled her eyes at how immersed I was in Call of Duty 2 but turned and walked back downstairs to leave me alone for a while. She knew I'd come out when I got hungry. I always did.

* * *

Just before noon, and probably ten minutes after the first belly rumble, my cell phone rang next to me on the bed. Crouching my soldier down behind the wall of sandbags on my rooftop perch so I wouldn't have to stop the game, I answered and held it between my ear and shoulder before having him stand back up and start killing bad guys again.

"Hello?"

"Merry Christmas." A sing-song voice came across the line making me smile.

"Merry Christmas to you, too, Bella."

"Did you have a good morning?"

"I did," I replied. "Got some good presents. How about you?"

"Oh, you know. I got some good presents, too. But then there was this_ one_."

I laughed. "Really shitty?"

"No," she murmured. "Best one ever, actually."

"Oh yeah? Who was it from?" She seemed a little playful. No harm in playing along.

"Just this boy I'm friends with."

"Friends, eh? Do I know him?"

I could picture her shrugging on the other end. "Probably not. He likes to make me mixed CDs of him singing and playing on his guitar." She went quiet for a second but then stopped playing coy. "I had no idea you were so good now. You never play actual songs when you mess with your guitar in front of us. Makes me sad I didn't know."

Pressing the start button to pause the game, I flopped back on the bed, ignoring the growls in my stomach. "I'm sorry, but it's kind of embarrassing, you know? When I sucked, it was nice to make you all laugh, but now I feel like I put too much of myself behind the music, like I'm showing you a part of my soul."

Saying the words out loud made me roll my eyes. It seemed so silly.

"Putting yourself into a talent is what makes it great and not just good, Edward. You blew me away."

I wasn't much of a blusher, but I was pretty sure some red had crept up on my cheeks. "Thank you, Bella."

"No, thank _you_. You're amazing. I loved it."

A soft knock came on my door, and I knew it was time for me to go downstairs. "I hate to say goodbye so quickly, but I think my mom is outside my door to tell me the table has been set for lunch. Talk to you when we get back to school?"

"Yep. Sounds good."

"Alright, enjoy the rest of your Christmas."

"You, too. And, hey, Edward?" She'd stopped me just as I went to close my phone. "You might think I don't know why you gave this to me, but I do, and I just thought I'd tell you that it was really sweet."

Closing my eyes, I dropped my flaming face into my free hand. "I don't know what you're talking about," I muttered.

"Yes, you do," she said quietly. "You remembered that James didn't get me a present last year, and you wanted me to have something extra to open just in case he did it again this year... and he did."

Anger rippled through the surprise that I felt that my actions were so transparent. She was one hundred percent correct, and though I expected him to be an asshole, it still didn't make it any better. She deserved more than constantly being let down by the man she loved. She deserved to spend Christmas with him and have him want to be with her in return. That was what was supposed to happen when you are with someone.

A flurry of questions passed through my mind as the silent seconds passed. Why did she let him get away with this? When would she put her foot down? Would she put her foot down? In the year and a half I'd known Bella, I'd seen two sides of her. A strong woman that stood up for herself and an insecure girl that let herself get walked all over by her boyfriend. Deep down, Bella was the first, no questions asked. Nine out of ten times, she was confident, at least when she was around me. Only when she allowed James to control everything was she the second.

She made me so mad.

But that didn't matter. As I'd said before, she could wind me up without even trying. I was used to that. Most days, she had me coiled tight with all kinds of emotions, and she was twisting me a little tighter at the moment.

"Are you mad at me?"

I had to ask. I'd asked the same question when she found out I'd lied about Heidi, and just like then, I was unsure of her answer, though I hoped she would surprise me again.

"I could never be mad at someone that did something like that for me," she whispered. "And I especially couldn't be mad at you. You made my Christmas perfect."

"Perfect?" I asked, the pitch in my voice rising.

"Honestly."

Elation fluttered around inside of my body like butterflies at her answer. I'd done good. Go me.

"Now, get going so your lunch isn't cold and know that I'll be listening to your songs non-stop for the next week and a half."

"Okay, okay!" I laughed. "Bye, Bella."

"Bye, Edward."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

Give me a show of hands of who is sick of James and his shit. *raises both hands* Two Christmases in a row that he didn't get her a gift? Ass. Do you think it's time for Bella to kick him to the curb? You may be in luck very, very soon.

I've been doing a lot of writing lately, and let me tell you that the future chapter I told you about in the last A/N is turning out to be incredibly fun! I'm expecting it to actually clock in at around 7000 words. I've been cracking myself up. Not sure if that's normal, but hey, there's some...ummmmm...other fun stuff, too, that isn't haha fun. So, get ready for some big changes to come! It's about to get interesting!

Thank you all for reading and reviewing!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	10. Chapter 10 March 2006

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl **for getting this back to me in one day! Go check out her completed story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: language, lemons, some angst

* * *

**CHAPTER**** 10**

_March__ 2006_

"Are you sure about this, Bella?"

"What do I have to be sure about?" She asked, taking her shoes off ahead of time to get in the security line.

"This," I replied, waving my hands down at her luggage. "Going to Phoenix. Surprising James."

Huffing, she stood back up straight with an exasperated look on her face. "Surprises are nice, Edward."

I grimaced with a sinking feeling in my chest. "Not always."

"Look," she sighed, placing her palms flat on my chest. "I haven't seen him since last August. That's seven months. He said he couldn't take off work at Christmas, but I'm not going to let him tell me that he has too much homework for me to see him over Spring Break. Nobody has that much homework. "

My eyebrows scrunched together looking down into her rich coffee brown eyes. Something seemed off with what she was saying, though she spoke every word calmly and evenly.

"A boyfriend should want to see his girlfriend more than just during the summers. He should drop everything, even if for just one hour if he had the chance to see her. Don't you agree? Don't I deserve an hour?"

Of course she did. She deserved every hour. But something was wrong with this picture. "Bella? What is–"

"I have to go..." she whispered, interrupting me, conveying her unwavering plea with four simple words. I wanted to ask her if she suspected something like I did, but I already knew by what her eyes were telling me. The worry behind the determination told me that she had no idea what was waiting for her in Phoenix, but she had to go anyways. She had to find out.

Rolling my head around on my shoulders to relieve the building stress, I gave in and handed her backpack over. "Call me when you find out your gate information for your return flight. I'll come get you."

"Thank you," she mouthed, stretching up to give me a quick peck on the cheek. She was already getting into line before the tingle was gone, but I couldn't leave it there.

"Call me for anything, Bella. Anything at all. I'm here."

She smiled softly, never breaking eye contact with me until she stepped through the metal detector, and just before she got lost in the crowd of passengers, I saw a wiggle of her fingers in goodbye. Never in my life had I wanted to grab onto fingers so much. Never had I wanted to hold onto somebody so tightly.

I hoped she knew what she was doing.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

Yikes! Here we go! We all know this isn't going to end well... See you next update! I'm going to try to get it to you super quick since this one was super short!

Thank you all for reading and reviewing!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	11. Chapter 11 Still March 2006

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**! Go check out her completed story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: **language**, lemons, **some angst**

* * *

**CHAPTER**** 11**

_Still__ March__ 2006_

Lying back, I stared up at the night sky and all of its wonders. Its stars, its planets, its infinite black space... I felt so small and insignificant in comparison to the questions the final frontier held. Were we all alone in the universe or was there other life out there? And if there actually was, were we the only _intelligent_ life?

"I see boobs."

For fifteen minutes, Emmett and I had been reclined in my gaming chairs waiting for Jasper to show up so we could play on my Xbox 360. In the meantime, though, we'd been searching for dirty constellations in the outer space posters my roommate had hung on our dorm room ceiling.

"Did you say Eric went to Florida for Spring Break or was that someone else?" he asked.

"When I said he went to Florida, I meant that loosely," I corrected. "Saying he went to Florida sounds cool, like he'll be going to beaches and hooking up with hot babes in bikinis. Eric went to space camp. Space camp in Florida and Spring Break in Florida are two completely different things. Only thing he'll be hooking up with is the International Space Station with his space shuttle simulator. And don't laugh because I know that. That's _all_ he talks about."

As Emmett chuckled and choked on his own spit, Jasper walked in the door quickly with an odd look on his face and shut it behind him.

"Red alert, fellas. Bella's back."

"What?" I asked in surprise, rocking forward so that I was sitting straight up with my legs holding me still. "That's not possible. She just left for Phoenix yesterday. Hell, I took her to the airport. I'm not supposed to pick her up for another four days."

He shrugged. "You may have taken her to the airport yesterday, Edward, but I'm pretty sure that was Bella that screamed 'I hate men!' and threw a high heel at my head when I went to my sister's room to lend her some money."

Rage shot through my entire body, sending me soaring off of the floor toward the door behind Jasper after the split second it took me to realize what went down when she went back to Phoenix. There could only be one reason for her to cut the trip short, and it was the reason I'd feared before she left. _James__._

"_Protect_ _your_ _nuuuuuuuuuts__!"_

Emmett's booming voice trailed off as the beige cinder block walls and red stairwell railings blurred past me in my dash through the corridors of the dorm toward the exit. The bushes and trees did the same thing outside. I didn't really know why I was running so fast or why I was even going to her when she had her girlfriends, but I felt like I had to, like it was instinct almost.

A crowd of girls had formed around the closed door into Rosalie's room, their hushed whispers being drowned out by the loud cries on the other side, but I didn't let them deter me from getting inside. With a few polite shoves out of the way, and the quietest turn of the knob I could accomplish, I opened the door.

"_Man__!"_

Before I even got a good look at who was in the room, the pointy end of a blue stiletto flipped end over end through the air, aimed directly at my forehead. In one of my classes, I'd just learned about a serial killer that used a high heel to kill all of her victims, and my God, I didn't want to be Bella's first in a slew of homicides. So, using the door as the most convenient shield I could find in the allotted time I had to find one, I swung it shut in front of my face and ducked like the pussy I was.

"It's Edward! Don't hurt me!" I squeaked.

"You may be Edward, but you're a goddamn man, and I fucking hate _ALL_ men!" she shrieked.

A loud thunk – I guessed another shoe – hit right where my ear was pressed up against the door, and I fell onto my ass holding my hand over the spot to alleviate the piercing ring it left behind. "I'm picking up on that!"

Staring at the door with absolutely no idea of what to do or say, I jumped when it flew open all of a sudden to show Bella standing there with a terrified Alice and Rosalie behind her. Tears flowed down her face like a faucet had been turned on in her eyes and mascara stained her beautiful cheeks black. She looked so lost. So alone and hurt. So broken. I'd never seen her look like that before, and it gutted me.

"Why do men do this to the women that love them?" she sobbed.

I felt my own throat constrict, but before I could say anything, she twisted in her spot to slam the door shut again. Using super quick reflexes I didn't even know I had, I threw my hands up and stopped the door from shutting me off from her again and stumbled into the room.

Bella was no longer standing when I finally found her again. She was no longer fighting me off or screaming madly. She was on the floor at the end of Rosalie's bed, bawling into her hands, looking so small.

"What happened?" I mouthed to the girls, who looked just as clueless as I surely did as to what to do.

"We don't know," Alice replied with a shake of her head and shrug of her shoulders.

"She won't tell us," Rosalie added too quietly for Bella to hear over her own cries.

"Go play my Xbox with Jasper and Emmett," I whispered, jerking my head toward the door. "Let me try with her."

They both looked at each other, unsure of if this was the best idea, but then they nodded and quietly slid out of the room, shutting the door behind them. Making sure to be careful, I got down on the rug behind her and timidly reached out my hand to touch her back. She flinched when my palm rubbed down the thin cotton of her shirt, and my heart sank. What had happened? "Talk to me, Bella."

"I don't want to."

"You do, or you'd still be trying to kill me with Rosalie's shoes."

Wiping unsuccessfully at her face, she groaned in weak aggravation. "Just leave, Edward."

"I won't do that." _I__ can__'__t __do __that__._

"Why not?" she retorted bitterly, spinning to face me. "Men use women, and then they leave women. That's what they do."

In my mind, that could only mean one thing. "Did James break up with you?"

"Break up with Bella Swan?" she snorted, her voice wavering from resolute to suffering. "Why, no, he still had a few weeks before he was done with me."

Confused by her cold words, I ran my thumb under her eye, trying to wipe away the makeup, and whispered, "You're going to have to elaborate, Bella. I don't understand."

Covering her face with her hands like she was ashamed, she tried to hide her new tears but looked back up when she knew she couldn't. "He couldn't break up with me until after I gave him the Diamondbacks season tickets I always got from Phil. I was just a pawn in his game, someone he was playing, so that he could squeeze just a little more money out of me. Season tickets can go for a lot these days."

What the fuck? James was using her for money? "Why did he need the cash?"

Her face scrunched up, a sign of the agony she held inside, and out of nowhere I grabbed her. This strange instinct I'd felt on my way over had resurfaced again seeing her the way she was after what James had done to her. My protectiveness surprised me, but what surprised me more was how she sobbed into the shoulder of my shirt and clawed at my back trying to hold on. I wanted to help her bury herself inside of my chest because that was what it seemed like she needed, but I couldn't do that for her, so I held her tighter, as tight as my arms would allow.

"She's pregnant," she bawled.

Alarmed, my voice got lost in my throat, but I was able to whisper, "Who's pregnant?" before another painful sob erupted from her throat.

"Victoria," she cried.

"Who is Victoria?"

Digging the tips of her fingers into my back, she pulled herself into my lap and pressed her heated, tear-soaked face into my neck, sending a shiver down my spine. I could feel her fear in answering, like if she said it out loud, it would make it real. But she already knew it was real, so not saying it had no effect on the truth... the painful truth.

"James' girlfriend in Phoenix..." she whimpered. "She's five months pregnant with his baby."

Ignoring the crazy pull her heart had on mine, both of them beating the exact same stuttering rhythm, I turned her body so that the two of them were pressed together and no longer alone. Disregarding the way my throat tightened to have her that close for the first time, I threaded my fingers through her hair and held her forehead against my neck so that she could feel even the slightest bit of comfort. And pushing down the flutter in my stomach when the tips of my fingers brushed the bare skin of her lower back, I continued my trail around her side and squeezed her even tighter, knowing that nothing could hurt her more than James already had.

She needed more from me right then, not the typical man I knew I could be and always had been. She needed me to listen and care. She needed me to be her friend.

"He leaves, Bella. But I don't."

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

:(

A couple observations here: James lived up to expectations, eh? And Bella got a little more than bargained for, it looks like. But who here think Edward sells himself too short? "She needed more from me right then, not the typical man I knew I could be and always had been." Hmmmm... I guess Edward doesn't seem to realize how much he's grown up like the rest of us have realized... Wonder how long it will take him to see what we see?

Sorry it took me so long to update. My laptop pooped out on me, so I'm using borrowed computers for the time being until it gets fixed. I'm hoping that will be soon. I feel weird writing on other people's laptops, so writing has been on hold for a week and a half. I don't like it one bit. I'm sorry if you didn't hear from me this time on reviews. I got back to several of you, but then it quit. Thank you all for reading and reviewing! I truly appreciate it!

**You can always check my profile for when the next chapter will be up! Also, you can find my three other stories on there.  
**

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


	12. Chapter 12 STILL March 2006

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thanks go to my beta **TheRainGirl**! She got this back to me within a few hours! Go check out her completed story Inamorata and meet Peeper. He's a naughty young man that likes to watch his new neighbor strip to chick rock in her bedroom...

No copyright is on this baby because the law says I can't, and I don't want to. Fanfiction is written in fun for you to read for free.

Rated M: language, lemons, **some angst**

* * *

**CHAPTER**** 12**

_STILL__ March__ 2006_

Spring Break was winding down. Classes were starting back up in two days, so students were arriving on campus again with the long awaited excitement that this was the home stretch of the school year. I should have been doing the things that they were doing, like the homework I'd put off until the last minute, but instead, I was on a ferry boat staring out at the crisp blue waters of Puget Sound with my friends.

It had been five whole days since Bella had come back to Seattle after finding out about James, his secret girlfriend and even more secret baby on the way, yet the only thing keeping Bella from being a full-on zombie was she hadn't resorted to eating people. Oh, and she was still beautiful. No rotting human flesh to be found on that body of hers. _Thank __God__._

None of us liked seeing her in such a state, but we didn't know how to help other than dragging her along wherever we were going in the hopes that she would start to liven up a little. If she would have smiled, we would have been happy. If she would have laughed, our work would have been done. But, sadly, she had done neither. So, we kept on.

"How long until we're there?" Alice asked.

Looking down at my watch, I did some mental calculating. "Once we unload at Bainbridge Island, we're looking at about a three hour drive with a stop or two scheduled in for you ladies. We'll probably get to the trail head at about noon after we get the equipment from my house. My guess is we'll have camp all set up no later than two."

"And where are we going exactly?" Rosalie questioned.

"Nowhere special," I smirked. "Just a little place out in the middle of the forest I used to hike to with my parents."

"This place is incredible, Edward," Alice whispered in awe, staring out into the darkness beyond the lighted ring of the fire. Night had fallen already, but I knew the view was still burned into her memory, as well as everybody else's. It was hard to forget the perfect circle of trees, the three hundred foot waterfall off the rock face in the distance and the flowers springing up in the grasses of the meadow. It should have been sad that this was all bathed in black now, but the twinkling of the stars above – something I could only see in the posters when I was in Seattle – made the night just as beautiful as the day.

"We need to do this every year," Jasper said, rotating his marshmallow in the campfire as I picked at my guitar. "None of us ever get out of the city unless we're going home, and then some of us go from one city to another. People forget how beautiful nature is."

Rosalie leaned over and rested her head on her brother's shoulder, squishing the top and bottom graham crackers and chocolate bars around the marshmallow to drag it off the stick for him. "This reminds me of when dad would take us camping as kids. It was never like this, but it was nice."

"We're not really kids anymore, are we?" Alice murmured, resting her head on Jasper's other shoulder, taking the s'more from his hand for a bite.

Emmett sighed heavily, his form of answering her question, and rested his head on my shoulder prompting me to shove him off with a laugh. "What's so wrong about not being a kid anymore?" I asked, truly not understanding why everyone was so sad about the passing of their younger days.

"School is harder," Emmett replied immediately with his pointer finger in the air.

"It's not as hard when you are taking classes that truly interest you, you big buffoon," Jasper teased.

Emmett scowled but eventually nodded in agreement. Though none of us really had much initial confidence in him in such a difficult major, I had to commend the guy for lasting an entire year. He didn't come out with awful grades, either, probably due to Rosalie's help on some level, but all of us had to admit that he walked away with a good understanding of science. When he ended up changing his major to sport and exercise science, we all supported him because it was logical and more tailored toward his lifestyle. Thanks to Rosalie's direction, he'd found his niche. She was perfect for him.

"You're sheltered from scary stuff when you are younger," she whispered. "Dad was always safe wherever he was. Mom never wavered in assuring us he was coming home. And there was never a chance that we would get called out of class one day. Funny how as you grow older you realize that it could have tipped the other way so easily. The reality kind of sucks."

"_There__'__s __always __a__ happily __ever __after__. __The__ prince__ doesn__'__t __cheat__ on __the__ princess__."_ Turning our heads, we found Bella wrapped in a blanket in her chair, staring blankly into the crackling fire. She didn't look any different than she had for the past five days, but we knew who had spoken, and that was more than she'd said since the night I held her on the floor. Despite how sad it was, it was something. A small step.

Clearing my throat to break our stares, I looked at each of my friends around the half circle. "Life gets harder when we're older because we can handle it now. We're wiser, and with that comes strength. Strength to make tough decisions. Strength to endure the hard. Strength to accept the truth. And strength to pick yourself back up when you're down. Be proud of what we're becoming."

* * *

_Snap__!_

Shooting straight up in my sleeping bag, I rubbed my eyes and stared out of the mesh window of my tent toward the steaming pile of amber and gray ash looking for the source of the breaking branch. Was it an animal? A human? The giant from my dream?

"Edward?"

A soft whisper, almost too low for me to hear so surely too low for anyone else to hear, came from the other side of my tent flap, and I leaned forward to unzip it. It was almost completely dark out, the moon and stars having been erased by a thick cloud cover that had rolled in since we went to bed, but I could still make out a small shape crouched down on the ground on her knees.

"Bella?" I croaked. The fatigue of only a few hours sleep was still set deep in my throat.

"Can I sleep in your tent?" she whispered.

My eyes were just as tired as the rest of me, but they were adjusting to the almost-zero light. I could see she was curled into herself, like she was scared half to death, a stance that matched the shake in her voice. "What happened? What's wrong?"

"I thought I heard something," she answered.

I'd been camping in the forests almost my entire life. My parents had taken me out not only to spend time as a family but to also teach me how to survive if I ever got lost in the woods. It sounded impossible that I would ever be in that situation, but with wilderness surrounding you at every turn in the area, they wanted to be safe. Because of their extensive preparations, I knew the sounds of the forest, so I knew by the stillness surrounding us there was nothing out there.

"It was probably the wind. Looks like rain may be blowing in from the coast. I promise it's nothing to be afraid of." I watched her for a long pause as the words sunk in, but I couldn't ignore how she hadn't relaxed even the slightest bit at my assurances. What had her so frightened? "Nothing is out there, Bella. I _promise_ you. Don't be scared."

She nodded her head minutely so that I knew she'd heard me, but as she went to stand, her eyes caught the light of the dying fire and I noticed the shimmer of her unshed tears for the first time. And that's when I realized it wasn't a noise that had her at my tent. Reaching up and extending my hand, acting on that same protective instinct that always surprised me, I curled my fingers around her wrist and held her still.

"Don't go," I said, like the wind had been knocked out of me.

I knew why I said it, but I didn't really _know_ why I said it. She was my friend, and I was the only one she found comfort in, but what was I wanting by saying those two words? I know you're scared, so stay with me and let me protect you tonight? I know your heart is broken, so stay with me and let me protect you for as long as you want me to? I was so confused. Nothing made sense, and nothing seemed right, but even if there was some imaginary boundary line that I was stepping over, I could not find it in me to care about the line or the ramifications of ignoring it and the questions that came. Not when I was kneeling below her. Not when my heart was racing like it was. Not when _she_ had come to _me_.

Tugging on her wrist, I slowly and carefully pulled her down into the tent until she was lying next to me surrounded by the sleeping bag and my arms. Though warm to my touch, she was shaking, and though timid and scared, she pressed herself along every inch of my torso and legs. The whole thing was overwhelming to my senses. Her scent, her heat, her body. They all triggered the deeply hidden emotions and feelings I had inside, but it was nothing compared to what her crying did to me.

"You knew all along, didn't you?" she sniffled.

I knew what she meant. There was no need to make her say the words out loud when they would only hurt her more. "Deep down I knew he was with someone else, yes."

"What happened to you and me being honest with each other, Edward?"

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and released it gradually, trying to search for the right words and reasons. There were so many things I could say, but despite every desire I had for Bella, it ultimately all came down to one. "How was I supposed to hurt my best friend by telling her the man that she loves... doesn't love her back?"

Her head lifted at my answer, her beautiful eyes rising as well to meet mine. Thick silence filled the tent as she stared at me, her eyelids heavy and her eyelashes lazily batting with creeping sleep, and I couldn't help but stare right back into the questioning innocence.

"I'm your best friend?" she asked.

"You are," I breathed, and she responded with a sigh that sent a burst of air through my parted lips, letting me get a hint of the sweet taste of her mouth for the first time.

"You're my best friend, too, Edward."

A strand of hair fell from out behind her ear and dropped into the moisture under her eye as I stroked her cheek with the back of my fingers, and I nodded. "I know I am."

Minutes passed after that with no more talk, just an understanding, and when her eyes eventually closed and her body sank into mine in sleep, I knew we'd finally gained complete trust. She was comfortable with me. She knew she could relax when I was there. She felt something that told her I was someone she needed in her life.

And then I was the terrified one.

I wasn't terrified by how everything seemed so different or by the changes that happened, that was for sure. Though I wished it was less painful for her, the outcome was what I had wanted for so long. So what was there for me to be terrified of?

I was terrified of five simple words... five simple words spoken by my own lips in response to four simple words spoken by hers in her dream.

"_Love __you__, __best __friend__."_

.

.

.

.

.

"I love you, too, Bella."

I was terrified because nothing had ever felt so right.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S END NOTE:**

I'm sorry (again) for taking so long. Hopefully this update was nice for you. RL for me has been turned upside down, and I'm trying to get back on my feet. Sadly, finding the energy to write has been rare. Please forgive me. Some of you know what's going on, and I want to thank you all for being there and helping me stand strong when I can't do it on my own. I just need to get back into the groove of doing the things that I love (like writing) because that's what brings me joy. Thank you all for reading and reviewing. I truly appreciate it.

_**Follow me on Twitter under the name parismyloveff**_ _**for not only a good time but random teasers.**_


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